October 2024

The Circles

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The Circles

By Claire Wadsworth

I am wondering if watched any of the 2024 Paris Olympic. Games?  The Olympic rings are one of the most recognizable symbols in the world, representing the Olympic Games and the values they embody. Designed by Pierre de Coubertin in 1913, the rings symbolize the union of the five inhabited continents of the world and the meeting of athletes from around the globe. Their interlocking-coloured rings stand for unity, peace, solidarity and friendship across all nations and peoples.

I am wondering if watched any of the 2024 Paris Olympic. Games?  The Olympic rings are one of the most recognizable symbols in the world, representing the Olympic Games and the values they embody. Designed by Pierre de Coubertin in 1913, the rings symbolize the union of the five inhabited continents of the world and the meeting of athletes from around the globe. Their interlocking-coloured rings stand for unity, peace, solidarity and friendship across all nations and peoples.

Pierre de Coubertin introduced the Olympic motto, “Citius, Altius, Fortius,” Latin for “Faster, Higher, Stronger.” This phrase embodies the relentless pursuit of excellence and the drive to surpass limits. Similarly, the circles of Christian Wholeness Framework challenge us to strive for spiritual and personal growth, urging us to reflect on Christ as our example. They prompt us to examine areas for improvement and to explore the underlying beliefs we hold about ourselves, fostering a continuous journey toward Christ-centredness.

The five interconnected circles—Social, Physical, Mind, Heart, and Spirit—symbolize the holistic nature of human existence, illustrating that we are a unified being comprised of various interdependent aspects. These dimensions of our being are shaped and coloured by factors such as age, gender, and culture, which together contribute to each one’s uniqueness. This concept aligns with the biblical passage from Psalm 139:13-14: “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” This verse underscores the idea that each person is a distinct creation, meticulously crafted by God, akin to a one-of-a-kind artwork. It suggests that every aspect of our being, from our physical form (Physical Circle) to our thoughts and feelings (Mind Circle), and our deep sense of ourselves (Heart Circle) has been intentionally designed. In this view, human diversity is not merely a product of biological or cultural differences but is also a reflection of divine intentionality, where every individual is thoughtfully and wonderfully made.

The journey of life can be likened to a race, one in which we are not alone but surrounded by spectators who encourage and support us, (Pyramid and Social Circle). This prompts a critical reflection: Are we spiritually fit for this race, or are there aspects of our lives that burden us and make the race more challenging? (Heart and Mind Circles)

Hebrews 12:1-2 provides a pertinent exhortation: “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith.” This passage emphasizes the need to discard the spiritual and moral encumbrances that hinder our progress, directing our focus towards Christ, (Spirit Circle) who is central to our faith and the ultimate guide in our life’s journey. In this context, some essential questions arise: Who governs our lives? (Control) Who or what occupies the central position in everything we do and are? (Centre). From where or from whom do we obtain our sense of value and worth? (Love). This evaluation is vital for determining the direction and success of our race, as it challenges us to examine the forces and values that influence our decisions and actions, and our very identity. Spiritual fitness and the alignment of our lives with Kingdom values are crucial for running the race of life with endurance and purpose (Heb 12:1).

Reflection: Engage in an honest self-assessment by completing your own circles. Reflect on what God is revealing to you about your true self. Consider whether any aspect of your life is misaligned with His identity and purpose for you. If discrepancies exist, consider the changes necessary to cultivate beliefs and behaviours that are more Christlike, seeking a deeper alignment with His teachings and example.  “Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need” (Heb 4:16)

The Triangle of Connection

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The Triangle of Connection

By Susanne Nikles

The triune loving Godhead decreed “Let us make man in our own image”. (Genesis 1;26) As the human race we were born out of the God who lives in constant love, relationship and attachment.  The triangle draws us back to where we belong – to that loving relationship with God, ourselves and others. It reminds us of the purpose that we can be instrumental in others connecting or reconnecting to God.

 But what does it mean to connect with God, ourselves and others?

An essential element is to let ourselves be wholly and fully loved by God. For me this has meant getting a growing picture of His endless grace-filled desire to be in relationship with me, no matter how I am. Ephesians 3: 18 & 19 describes the incredible dimensions of God’s love.  When I was with a client in trialogue, she had a picture of God with His arms wide open, saying “I’m always here for you, you just have to turn to me”. That picture often reminds me of His constant invitation. And yet how often during a day in our stress or distress, do we turn more away from Him, rather than to Him?  I have to admit that I often allow the uninvited guests of disappointment, frustrations, small griefs and losses, to initially push me away from, rather than towards those open welcoming arms. 

My capacity to hear God’s whispers in the jostle and hustle of my daily life seems to grow when I am able to take longer times of resting in and delighting in His presence. I need to take intentional time to still the busyness of my mind, and my inner anxieties, and then I can feel that deep desire expressed by the psalmist (Psalm 27:4 ) to  ‘gaze upon the beauty of the Lord’. I can hear his voice saying to me “Seek my face, and my heart says to You Your face Lord, will I seek”. (v 8). He knows everything about me, and everything I am going through as expressed in Hebrews. “It was essential that He be made like His brethren in every respect, in order that He might become a merciful High Priest”. (Hebrews 3 : 17). Because He Himself has suffered and been tempted, we can boldly come before the Throne of Grace to find help with every  need (Hebrews 4: 15 & 16).

To know that He truly cares about the state of my heart, my soul and even my body, gives me encouragement and permission to connect with myself.  Encouragement to breathe deeply and notice how I am really doing. And to accept, rather then judge, or blame myself – or deny what I don’t want to see! What a precious gift to know that whatever state I am in, I can bring myself  back into those open welcoming arms of love.

With others: The triangle can represent the relationships within the trinity of attachment, love and connection, and this can be a guide for us to have life giving supportive relationships where we are truly known, with at least a few others. The value of having a few close reciprocal relationships has been scientifically shown to improve the length and quality of our lives. Jesus himself had special relationships with Peter, James and John, and invited them into the deeper places of His life, in the transfiguration on the Mount, and into the garden of Gethsemane.

It is from that life giving space of grace that we can then extend welcome and delight to those we encounter. To be truly present with another, even for a few minutes, can switch on the relational circuits in our brains. The triangle invites us to “Love one another as I have loved you”. (John  13: 34 – 35). My mother’s favourite verse was “We love because He first loved us”. (1 John 4:19). In her humble simple way, she was a living example of this in my life.  Being truly loved by God and others allows us to pass that on to others.

And then we may have that privilege of being part of another’s journey towards, or back towards their Loving Heavenly Father. The third side of the triangle reminds us of the great commission “Go into all the world and make disciples”. My daily prayer is that today I may notice and take those opportunities to extend grace and bless others, that they may taste something of the goodness of God through me.

Reflect:

What spoke to your heart today as you read this?

How might you deepen that side of the triangle between you and God? Do you regularly take time to connect with yourself and bring all of you before our loving God?

How might you build life giving relationships in your own life?  How might God be inviting you to give this to others?

Through the Lens of the Circles: “God be the Center for “Who am I?”

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Through the Lens of the Circles:
“God be the Center for “Who am I?”

By Sally Ladignon

The question of “Who am I?” seems a bit overwhelming to answer especially if there is nothing to anchor on. The 5 circles and its 25 sectors in the Understand Step of the Christian Wholeness Framework (CWF) provided the fitting answer to said question because it captured the Biblical anatomy of man. The circles give a map of “who am I?” as created in God’s image and likeness as shouted out in Psalm 139:23-24 which says,

“Ipraise you, for Iam fearfully and wonderfully made. For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.”

The truth that we are God’s masterpiece cannot be denied, but many might find it hard to believe especially that people are more prejudiced to define “who am I?” based on the triple A of false securities, which are appearance, achievement and authority. All these are temporal with no eternal attachment. The “who am I?” is more than our looks, accomplishments and influences.

I admired people like Drs. John Warlow and Arnold Lazaro who came up with their respective prodigious works on understanding and helping people. Dr. Warlow articulated the beauty and wisdom of the 5 circles with its 25 sectors for deep understanding of “who am I?” with emphasis on God as the center of our being. Likewise, Dr. Lazaro with his multimodal perspective used 7 considerations of assessment to understand and eventually plan for appropriate interventions in an abbreviated acronym of BASIC ID, which stands for Behavior, Affect, Sensation, Imagery, Cognition, Interpersonal factors, and Drug/Biological. These 7 elements (or sectors as called in CWF) represented just 3 circles (social, physical and mind). The 18 more sectors by Dr. Warlow will further draw out the missing puzzle pieces in the “who am I?”

I likened the 5 circles to an earphone when I listen to people’s narratives as they come for help. Their narratives are information-rich containing life themes revealing their conditions sector by sector in each circle. Sectors are like pieces of puzzle, which needed to securely fit to each other to paint a complete picture of “who am I?” promoting better understanding where one might be coming from.

May I introduce a young female adult who I called “Growing Little Girl” or GLG for short who I saw through the lens of the circles. She came for counseling because of a pressing concern. Life was difficult for her while growing up. Most of the time she is below the waterline navigating from left to right or right to left of the square. She is now 30 years old, working and living alone by herself for a long time. During our sessions I reflected back to GLG her narratives circle by circle which she appreciated and felt understood.

Social Circle

GLG and her boyfriend work in the same company as an office staff and a supervisor, respectively. Their relationship lasted for a year and was kept a secret from their co-workers as demanded by the guy until he finally broke up with her. This left her so devasted and heartbroken. She just cannot accept the break-up easily and shamelessly begged him to give their relationship a second chance. Annoyed by her persistence for a reconciliation, he thought of lodging a harassment complaint to local officials to prevent her from getting near him. This pained her more and felt so bad and rejected.

At work, she received a lot of disapproving feedback from supervisors and to compensate for (un)satisfactory performance, she worked extra hours not claiming for overtime pay. She also volunteered for additional work outside of her usual assignments to prove her worth in the company.

At early childhood, her mother left the family and eloped with another man. She and her younger brother were left under the care of their father and his female siblings who also have their own families to tend. Such early abandonment imprinted an empty core in her heart circle damaging the love (self-esteem) and truth (identity) sectors. She lived from one aunt to another when her father died while she was in elementary grade experiencing physical, emotional, verbal and mental abuse.

Physical Circle

By just looking at her appearance no one cannot suspect that she is actually below the waterline. She always put smiles on her face to hide whatever deep hurts are there. She blames herself a lot and harbor guilt feelings when several relationships failed. Because of the break-up she cannot sleep and eat well. Her bothering gastrointestinal issues worsened and needed medical attention from time to time. She also sought psychiatric help for her anxiety concerns. She cried a lot as she remembers how significant people abandoned her without proper closure.

Mind Circle

She lives in fear because of abandonment issues she experienced at home, schools, work and special relationships. Her fear of abandonment makes her anxious for losing someone she cares about. She felt betrayed by people who she thought would be there for her, but at the same time felt guilty for failing them to keep the relationship.

The recent break-up left her so devastated and heartbroken. She felt dead inside, struggled so much mentally and emotionally while wondering where her emotions are coming from which made her cry easily.

Her basic desire is to be helpful by pleasing people which end up abandoning herself of her own needs.

Heart Circle

She realized that people easily gave up on her and leave without reciprocating her need to be loved. She thought she is not enough and lack in many ways for people to appreciate and love her in return. She believed that she is not worth keeping that people will just dump her when they found out she is flawed.

The default message of her childhood that “it’s not okay to have her own needs” led her to repress her own needs and prioritize others’ needs losing her value and identity along the way. She centered more on others missing the triangle of relationship that is founded in God’s love so she can love God with all her heart, soul, mind and strength (Mark 12:30-31)

Spirit Circle

Starting to relate to Jesus as her personal Lord and Savior and not experiencing yet how she can cast her burden upon Him. Oftentimes, she needed to be facilitated to walk her journey and understand the transformation God is doing using her deep pains.

 GLG’s journey will be marked by learning to uproot lies stemming from negative childhood experiences by entrenching God’s truth to live free from past wounds. Although this entails a crucial process, the goals and plans of interventions will be discussed and employ not only the 5 circles, but the entirety of CWF.

I am still a beginner and a trainee in terms of adapting CWF into my counseling practice but through supervision and collaboration with the LW community, GLG will discover and settled of “who she is” in God being her center.